what not to do

jan 8th

let's see...

what should you not do during pregnancy?

do not buy a can of pringles. 

the saying is true: once you pop, you can't stop.

i think i could finish a can in one sitting.

do not read the birth story of a mom who had a baby with down syndrome.

you will be a mess.
you will not stop crying until the end.
and even then, it will be hard for you to pull it together.

do not try on clothes in the store.

its disappointing and frustrating.

nothing is cute and nothing fits correctly.

i found that just bringing it home and facing my misery there, is better.

do not ask your husband for reese's peanut butter cups.

he will buy you a king size and you will refuse to share.

it's not a pretty sight.

do not go online shopping.

your cart will end up having over $3000 worth of items.
(one of which being a new refrigerator, so i don't feel that bad)

then your husband will deny the purchases

and you will sit on the couch in fury

and blog instead.

just some tips.

i'm no expert.

update: week eighteen

jan 3rd

i'm eighteen weeks.

weight? i haven't weighed myself this week, but the last time i weighed myself i had gained 4 lbs. i'm still not wearing maternity clothes, but mostly because i don't have any and not because they wouldn't fit.  my friend, jana, brought me a whole bag of clothes for me to borrow and i'm excited to bust them out.  i plan to go shopping for some dress pants soon because i'm mostly wearing dresses and skirts rights now because they are the comfiest.

cravings?  i would still die for a large diet coke.  and sushi.  i've been eating some lunch meat after throwing it in the microwave so my need for a turkey sandwich is gone. and, i wasn't eating chocolate last time i checked in at 9 weeks, but that's a joke now.  i am definitely eating chocolate.  hope baby loves it.

side effects? honestly, i don't have many things going on right now.  i still have potty breaks every night but most times i am able to go back to sleep. lately, when people ask me how i feel i tell them i don't really feel pregnant except for my clothes getting tight, which is a bonus because i feel normal again.

baby?  baby is the size of a mango and is able to hear us now.  studies have shown that the song you sing to your kiddo in the womb is recognizable once they are born.  ronnie and i have been taking turns singing baby beluga - a song i learned in kindergarten that we sing to our puppies a lot.  also, if ronnie and i are fighting (which never happens) i try to yell at him in the sweetest voice ever.  its comical.

preparations? we still haven't done much.  we cut our baby names list down by about half, but we have no winners. we've bought some diapers, because marge suggested i start stock piling so that way we spread out the cost.  but that's about it.  i think its almost overwhelming all the things you could buy. and i've had a lot of people offer some of the things they don't use anymore, so i'm waiting to see what we can borrow before i go buy a lot of stuff. plus ronnie and i are still deciding if we will find out the gender so i also don't want to buy a lot in case i end up knowing and wanting to do something more specific for a girl or boy.

the best thing? my appetite has come in.  i wasn't really hungry until i hit week seventeen and now i feel like i could eat a horse.

the worst thing?  the fact that i feel like i could eat a horse.

so there it is. 

me at eighteen weeks.

what a let down

dec 19th

we finally told my family.

and nothing really went as planned.

first, my mom, dad, brian and jaime.

we hung our christmas stockings with a little tag

on our kiddo's stocking saying 'due in june'

they came in and the only one that understood was my brother,

but he waited for someone else to catch on.

my dad was even looking at them and asked how many people lived here.

(insert hand to the forehead)

finally, my brother called it out and everyone was excited,
(more shocked)

but the initial plan
did. not. work.

then came my extended family.

all my aunts, cousins and grandma

get together for christmas cookie day.
instead of doing the exchange idea i decided to tell through my cookies.

i ordered pink and blue onesie cookies from a local bakery.

when i went to pick them up, the lady had the date wrong
and didn't have them made.

no cookies.

so ronnie and i stayed up that night baking sub-par sugar cookies.

but it worked out.

every female in my family was in tears and full of hugs.
but the initial plan
did. not. work. 

last, i told my friends.

we met in warrensburg
to welcome a friend back to the states

and i sent them all a *picture text at the same time

and only one went through,

the rest either never made it or it took 5 minutes.
so they all got them at different times and there was some confusion.
when they all finally saw the text,
there was a mixed reaction.
i think it was too shocking.
shannon was probably the happiest i have ever seen.
she's been waiting years for this,
but the initial plan
did. not. work.

*this was the picture i sent them

wah wah.

but whatever, i'm just happy they know!
and everyone is loving baby cox.

now i just have to design a christmas card
to tell everyone else.

the secret is out

dec 4th

the secret is not really out,

but there are a handful of people that now know.

basically, ronnie's family.

it just happened to fall that we had plans with his side of the family

the week that we could start telling people.

so his mom, dad, sister, brother-n-law, step brother, step mom,

niece and nephew all know.

it was fun to tell them.

i made little cards and had them open them.

ronnie's sister had the best reaction.

she screamed and hugged us both,

then later on cried because she was so happy.

it's exciting to tell people,

i've been looking forward to this for so long,

but it also makes me really anxious.

like i want to rush to the doctor

for another reassuring - yes, you are still pregnant!

i mean, yes, we've heard the heart beat,

but that was 3 weeks ago

and i don't get to go back for another 2 and a half weeks.

i guess now that people know,

i just want everything to stay okay.

we waited so long to tell anyone

and i would hate hate hate to have to go back and untell people.

that's why for now,

i am making everyone we tell swear to secrecy

one, so i get the joy of sharing our news.

but two, so i get to choose who knows,

just in case.

i'll feel much better after december 19th.
or maybe i won't feel really reassured until june 12th?

sharing the news

nov 18th

basically i just want to call people up and shout out the news.

but that is no fun.

so we're trying to schedule weekends with all of our families

in a short time period to get the news out fast.

unfortunately it's not going to be as fast as i would like.

dec. 1 - were going to st. louis with ronnie's sister

and her family to meet ronnie's mom and grandma

for his gma's 90th birthday.

we can share the news then.

i was thinking have them all open cards at the same time

that say "you're going to be an aunt!" (gma, cousin, etc.)

dec. 2 - we'll be in warrensburg to pick up puppies

from my parent's so we'll stop by ronnie's dad's

to tell him and kathy the news.

i'd like to keep the card thing up and give them one as well

letting them know they're going to be grandparents - again.

dec. 8th - my parent's are coming to lee's summit

to meet brian, jaime, ronnie and i for a little christmas day.

we shop, go out to dinner, ride around looking at christmas lights.

it's the perfect time to tell them, but i can't decide how.

at first i thought i could have them meet at my house and casually mention

my new christmas stockings to see if anyone notices there is an extra one.

but i doubt i can get brian, jaime and the girls to pack themselves up in a car,

drive 10 mins,

and then unpack themselves just to come inside.

so i don't know yet how i will tell them. 

hopefully i come up with something genius.

dec. 15th - my grandma, aunts, uncles and cousins are getting together

to celebrate christmas and have our cookie day.

we do a christmas gift exchange and i plan on cheating a bit.

i want my mom to hand out the numbers and make sure i get #1,

so i'll pick my own gift and it will be a onesie with a little due date.

i can't wait for their reaction.

telling my friends is still undecided. 
i know we're getting together for new year's eve

and i could do it that night,
but waiting another two weeks after so many people

know will be hard. but it's also right around christmas
 so it will be just as hard to get all

my girls together and i would really
prefer not to send it out through an email.

we shall see.

maybe i have the ability to last that long.

maybe not.

the girls in st. louis is easy. 
a christmas card is fun
and i'm not concerned about them finding out early
because they won't run into someone else
like the girls here could.

so there's the plan.
i wish it were here already!

weeble wobble

nov 20th

i've been having some dizzy spells.

four of them to be exact,

but one major one.

ronnie had just left for work,

so i got up and was in the hallway bathroom

getting ready to get ready, if you will.

i got super dizzy and light headed.

my eyesight went blurry and dark.

i thought i was going to pass out.

instead of hitting the sink or door

on my way down, i thought

the floor was probably my best options.

so i dropped to my knees and

crawled back to my bedroom.

i grabbed a pillow off my bed and my cell phone

and laid on the floor and called ronnie.

he was not concerned.

said i probably needed to eat something.

cool.  and thanks.

so i laid there for 15 minutes and drank some water.

when i finally got up, i felt awful and i was so pale.

i am always pale, but i'm talking like being an extra on twilight pale.

it was not cute.

neither was my clammy face.

but after another 15 minutes

i felt fine.

when i read the app on my phone about this stage of pregnancy

it mentions having dizzy spells.

check and check.

oh and when i told the girls at work about this,

one of them thought i should take a pregnancy test.

she was sure that this was a sign i was pregnant.

if only they knew...

heartbeats

nov 14th

i feel like i had my first baby experience.

i know this kid has been making me sick that last several weeks,

but today we met.
and it wasn't through a ultrasound like i thought,
they're waiting until my january appointment for that,
but still,
today was great.

ronnie and i went to the doctors office and sat around a lot.

they weighed me

and then we sat some more.

finally the doctor came in.

she asked some general questions

and had me lie back.

just like in the movies,

she moved a little monitor over my stomach

and we listened.

she couldn't find anything.

i got super nervous.

she said that it's pretty normal at 10 weeks

to not hear a heartbeat,

but to me it felt like bad news. 

like i was setting myself up for really bad news.

i have had enough pregnant friends to know,

the sooner you hear the heartbeat,

the better.

so she kept searching and searching

and we finally found our little booger.

he/she was hidden all the way over on my right side.

but you can definitely tell when you find your little one because

their heartbeat sounds like a train.

fast and furious.

i could hear my heartbeat too,

slow and steady.

the difference is crazy,

ronnie was pretty stoic,

but as soon as the doctor left the room,

he was all smiles and cheers.

i think he wanted to seem manly.

hello, you made a baby.

we get it, you're a guy.

so today was pretty fabulous.

and its killing me that i can't call my mom and tell her,

i know she'd be so happy,

but we'll wait.

i feel like the next 6 months of my life will be a waiting game.

ready. go.