Monday, October 16, 2017

(a look back)

so yester was pregnancy and infancy loss awareness day.
i went back and read some of my blog posts that i wrote
before i had announced my 2nd pregnancy - - and then,
once we lost the baby, i never posted them.
this was my first post after finding out
we were pregnant in july.

aug 6 2014

i'm pregnant! (happy)
again. (ahhh)
its my worst nighmare and
my dream come true.
i truly truly hate being pregnant.
but like every mom in the world says,
its worth it.
ronnie and i decided that we were going to
for sure have a second kiddo pretty soon
after brette was here.
i'd say we made the decision when she turned 6 months last december.
nothing like christmas to make you want more kids, i guess.  
and i knew that i wanted brette's brother or sister
to be close in age.
brian and i are only 19 months apart
and that's what i wanted for her too.
we waited a few months and then "tried" in april with no luck.
(i was secretly thankful so i could have
the vacation of my life in mexico without
turning down all the free booze.)
we skipped may and june because i didn't want a kid
in february or march.  (too many family birthdays already)
and started trying again in july for an april birthdate.
and yep, got pregnant again within the first week.
apparently, i should be thanking my lucky stars
that ronnie and i were so careful the first five years
we were married or we could have easily had kiddos
way before we were ready.
i've known for a couple weeks,
but i had my doctor's appointment yesterday to confirm.
and guess what:
my due date is march 28th. 
i guess your first two weeks pregnant are before you even conceive.
i didn't realize that with brette, but yeah.
they go off the date you started your last period.
which puts me at the end of march.
i swear, i can't plan a due date for the life of me.
oh well.
late march sounds like a perfect time to welcome another
little wonder into this family.
tomorrow i'll be seven weeks.
only 33 to go.
is it over yet?

it's weird to read how nonchalant i was.
i went another 5 weeks before i lost the baby.
crazy enough, reid was conceived not even a month after that.
i'm very lucky.
not even a year later, i was holding another baby girl.
and even though i'm at home right now with two sick kids,
i couldn't be more grateful.

prayers for all the mammas still waiting on their babies.

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