Thursday, August 27, 2015

hot mess

last night was not good.
i had a lot going on and i knew
it was going to be a test of my planning skills.
i had to get all three of us ready so we could
go to the store for balloons,
grab dinner,
meet a neighbor lady,
and then head to westport
for eden's 3rd birthday by 6:30.
ronnie was m.i.a. because he
was working two hours out of town.
we were ready by 5:00 and
it was going fine until
reid threw up all over herself and her
car seat as we were walking out the door.
not cool.
literally the puke was pooled around her as it drained
out of the bottom of the car seat.
oh. my. god.
so i had to change her clothes and clean her seat,
which made me late from the get go.
not to mention i had broken out in a crazy sweat.
i blame the hormones.
i had to scratch going to the store and drove
through McDonald's to grab B some chicken nuggets.
they forgot to give me a straw so i
couldn't give her milk because
there was no way i was cleaning up another
car seat after she inevitably split it.
this means i get to hear "i need a drink" 
at least 100 times while i rush to meet our neighbor.
i was 5 minutes late meeting her and
she turned out to be a talker so at 6:15 i finally
excused myself so i could rush down the highway to
miss eden's ice cream party.
we are now 20 minutes late.
no worries,
i get the girls out and my brother and dana are
there to help me out.
i leave reid with dana while brian and i go get B some
ice cream so she can join the other kids.
as soon as we sit down to eat,
i realize that it is now after 7:00 and its time for reid to nurse.
i grab her and go sit in my car (fun times) while
brian and dana take care of brette for me.
she falls or bumps her head or something and is crying
so brian brings her over to the car.
not much i can do but she stops crying and goes on her way.
that's when the nice gentleman in the car next door wants to start
up conversation about the birthday song (i have no idea why)
and i'm just trying to make sure he doesn't get a good look at my boob.
meanwhile, i miss singing to eden and watching her open up her gifts.
son of a bitch.
i cut nursing short so i can get back to the party and
away from "birthday song" guy.
things get better for awhile.
i am able to sit and talk,
help B make her way through a party
and enjoy myself.
brian helps me load up my crew.
(brothers are super great stand-ins when husbands are gone.)
its now around 7:45 and on a normal night B would be
heading to bed in 15 minutes.
instead we're 30 minutes away and reid decides
that the quickie dinner i gave her earlier is not cutting it.
she starts crying every time the car comes to a stop,
which is all the time as we make our way out of westport and
through the plaza.
we're not used to reid crying in the car,
so it pisses off brette and she starts yelling at reid to
"no cry more"  and "stop it."
newborn crying?  check.
2 year old yelling? check.
headache for mamma?  check.
want to kill daddy?  check.
fun times.
when i hit the highway i rolled down the windows
and reid fell asleep while i had to tell brette the title of
every song that came on the radio.
this really fun game we play all. the. time.
at what point can you just turn up the music and ignore her?
i called ronnie when i hit our road and he met me in the driveway
(in his undies because he's been enjoying a nice hot shower in an empty house)
to help me unload and get B ready for bed
while i fed my starving newborn.
as i finally laid down that night around 10:00 i realized i never ate dinner
and i was still in my button-up shirt.
and THAT is why we are rarely out of the house past 6:00pm.
pass me a beer,
i need a break just thinking about it.


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